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CHAPTER II.

ALMOST the moment Daffodil sprang into the water, she felt the dog close upon her. He all but caught her; indeed he just reached her floating hair with his nose and nearly seized it; but she sank, her feet touched the bottom, it gave way beneath her, and down, down, she went through soft thick mud, so that, if she had not covered her face with her hands and her apron, her eyes and nose and mouth would have been quite choked up.

In a few seconds—only it seemed much longer to her—she felt firm footing. But she did not consider that much was gained by that; for what was the use of standing in that horrible mud, which would most likely stifle her presently? So she stamped about to see if she could get farther down: for getting up through the mud was quite hopeless. And, all at once, something gave way with a loud crash and clatter, and down she fell, head over heels, too fast to leave her time to know she was falling till it was over. The next thing was that she was lying on a soft wet floor of some sort of moss or grass, with the fragments of the roof and ceiling from where she had broken through lying about her, pell‐mell.

She picked herself up, and jumped about to see if she was hurt anywhere; which she was very much pleased to find she was not. Then she observed how terribly dirty her clothes and her hands had got, and she felt sure her face must be as bad. She could hardly help crying at this disaster, for she heard sounds of running about and calling which seemed getting nearer, and she was sure the river people had heard the noise of her fall and would come upon her in a moment. Probably they would excuse her having broken their ceiling, as she could not know it was there when she stamped on it, but how could they be expected to be glad to see a visitor in so unpresentable a condition—all over greasy black mud? And the worst was that some of it was dripping from her and soiling the beautiful green floor.

She was in a large room, as large as a church, only not so high for its length as we think suitable for great buildings. Its walls were built in a curve, so that you could not say where they left off and the ceiling began; it was just as if the room had been made out of the hollowed half of an enormous ball. And its doorways, of which there were too many to count just then, were semicircular too. All over the walls there grew, where we put papering, a delicate covering that looked like chickweed spotted in various patterns with forget‐me‐nots around white or yellow water‐lilies. Towards the top of the ball began long waving grasses and water‐plants, getting longer and closer together the higher up they were, till they knotted themselves in tangles overhead and their long leaves hung page: 14 gracefully downwards—but there was a sad gap where Daffodil had tumbled through. The drooping leaves were bright with sparkling drops of water that kept trickling down on to the floor; and the chickweed and lilies and forget‐me‐nots were all glistening with wet. Right round the room was a canal of clear greenish water, exactly like the phosphorescent sea that shows such a wonderful gold‐green light when the oars dip into it on dark nights: and it was this canal which lighted the room. It was bordered with lilies and forget‐me‐nots in a pattern something like the wall patterns, but there were rich red flowers mixed among them. The whole of the room was carpeted with the soft wet moss on which Daffodil had fallen. It was an odd sort of floor, for it seemed to have water under it and it shook at every step she took, so that she was afraid it would give way beneath her: but it was quite secure, and was very nice for people who did not mind wet feet. There were about the room chairs and tables and couches, which all seemed made of the same kind of material as the floor, and which had growing upon them patterns in flowers or in differently tinted leaves and mosses: and, in the centre of the room, just under the greatest drip from the leaves in the ceiling, there were raised steps, with seats on each step but the lowest, and on the highest step of all two larger seats which seemed meant for thrones. It was a most magnificent apartment, and Daffodil was shocked at having so damaged it by her manner of entering it.

She had not much time to reflect upon that, however. On every side there was a pattering and page: 15 scuffling and slopping sound of steps, and nearer and nearer came a noise like shouting and coughing and sneezing all in one: people seemed to be calling to each other in this extraordinary fashion. There were no doors to the doorways, and Daffodil saw through three entrances at once a rush of strange‐looking creatures with such bright large eyes that, in her alarm, she seemed to see nothing but eyes. For a moment it crossed her mind that they would not be able to get at her, because of the canal: but then she remembered that they would not have built a room into which you could only get through the roof, and she gave herself up for lost.

But, to her amazement, as soon as they caught sight of her, they stopped short in the archways, huddling together as if they were in a terrible fright, and some of them turned right round and began pushing at the others in order to break through them and run away: so there was a great hubbub and confusion. And presently they had all scuffled away, and she could hear them making a noise as if they were discussing what they must do. Every now and then one or two would come and peep at her stealthily from the archways; and she noticed that they seemed a little bolder each time, so she felt sure that they would soon decide on facing her again.

However, she began to feel less frightened, for she had become certain that these creatures, though they were very much larger than any frogs she had ever seen or heard of, and walked, or rather waddled, upright, and wore bright‐coloured garments on their bodies, were nothing but great green and yellow frogs. page: 16 “Frogs are not beasts of prey,” she said to herself, “and have not sharp claws and teeth: they cannot do me much harm. And they do not look ill‐tempered, either: if I can only make them understand that my coming through their roof was an unexpected accident, perhaps they will excuse it.”

So the next time one of the frogs peeped at her she smiled and nodded to him, and pointed to the hole in the ceiling and to the fragments on the ground, and tried to make him understand by signs how sorry she was. The frog stared at her, and, after a little, he seemed to get some notion of what she meant, for he nodded to her and made signs as if he meant to ask if she had fallen through, and then called out something to her. But what it was Daffodil could not make out, for it seemed to her like “Chrchrkkerkeckkeckghrchr.” He said it twice and seemed to expect an answer, and so Daffodil replied, as politely as she could, “I am sorry I do not understand Froggais, Sir.” She thought that would the the proper name to call his language, because, as Français is the name of the language they speak in France. Froggais seemed the same sort of word for the language they speak in Frogland.

The frog looked, and shook his head, then ran away. Presently more frogs came and questioned in signs, and Daffodil answered in signs: then they spoke, and Daffodil answered as she had to the first frog. Then they went away and others came, and it all had to be done over again. And then others came, and others, until Daffodil grew tired. But she thought it would be rude to show it, and she went on answering them in the same fashion.

At last she heard advancing from several sides at once a sort of flop‐flop, slop‐slop, which she knew must be the sound of frog feet walking together in a measured quick time. And presently, and all at the same moment—such was the beautiful precision into which the frog army was drilled‐there appeared at each entrance the head of a column of soldiers. The soldiers were dressed in short yellow tunics spotted with orange, with broad belts of plaited rushes from which hung swords made of fish‐bones of a glittering whiteness. They wore also short leggings, which Daffodil thought looked quite like crimson bell‐flowers, fringed at the edge. And it is no wonder that they looked so, for that is just what they were, though she did not know it then. Their arms and feet were bare like those of the other frogs she had just seen, but, while the other frogs were bare‐headed, these wore helmets plaited to match their belts, with a brown tuft on the top. Their helmets seemed rather uncomfortable head‐dresses for them, as they were always tumbling over their eyes and noses, and Daffodil wondered that they did not take them off and throw them away, for she did not know that the best military authorities have always decided that a soldier should have at least one part of his uniform exceedingly inconvenient. They had rush straps across their chests, in which were secured fish‐bone weapons pointed like lances at one end and, at the other, club‐shape with a small stone in a socket of the bone: these rested on their shoulders. They had nothing in their hands as they marched, and they kept them crossed on their breasts. The frog page: 18 recruits always find it very difficult to learn to do this; because the frogs who are not soldiers are accustomed to use their arms (which we call their forelegs) to balance themselves as they walk. The recruits keep tumbling down when they first try to do without this assistance, and it takes several years for them to acquire the art of moving steadily on their hindlegs when their forelegs are folded over the breast. But the regiment sent against Daffodil was composed of veteran soldiers, and their gait was quite erect and even, unless they tried to go very fast.

The reason they had been so long in coming was not, however, only that they could not go very fast. It is not the custom for them ever to wear the same uniform twice, and, as they had not expected to be called out on active service that day, their tunics were not ready. Some too suspicious frogs afterwards accused them of cowardice for not confronting the invader more speedily; but that was not fair. The yellow tunics were not made of a common flower and could not be found in a moment for a whole regiment.

Daffodil had plenty of time to observe her assailants, for they had many military movements to execute before they could close upon her properly. First the word of command was given for the columns to halt in the entrances; then they fell in and fell out and formed into triangles and circles a great many times; and then each column arranged itself into a sort of curl twisted round and round. Then the word was given and the outer frog of each curl plunged into the canal, all in the same half‐ page: 19 second, then the second outer frog of each curl, and so they went on, the curls unwinding by degrees, until every flog had crossed the canal. And they did this so beautifully that the tenths and twentieths and fiftieths and hundredths and so on of each curl crossed precisely at the same moment, up to the very last of all. The outer flog of each curl had now become the innermost of the curl newly formed, each frog, as he crossed, turning the proper way to keep the curve perfect. Then they all fell in and fell out and marched and halted all about the border of the canal until all the curls had joined together. And then they went on wheeling round and round till at last there was one great curl with Daffodil inside the head of it.

This manœuvre having been so successfully accomplished, the Officer in Command, who was the innermost frog of the curl, advanced resolutely and summoned Daffodil to surrender. He was not so tall as most of his regiment, so that he did not quite reach to her shoulder, but he was very fat and broad and looked extremely dignified; so Daffodil made him the most respectful curtsey she could. As she did not understand what he said, she did not make any remark in reply, but the Officer in Command accepted her curtsey as a token of submission. He turned to his men and made a short speech. “Brave soldiers,” he said, “we have conquered. All honour to your dauntless hearts: I am proud of you.”

“And we of you, and we of you,” shouted the soldiers, taking advantage of a slight pause in the speech.

“Hush, my brave soldiers,” said the Officer in Command, “you interrupt. I forgive you; it is the truthful fervour of your honest minds that forces you to speak; but no more. I resume. We have conquered, brave soldiers. The enemy surrenders. We will be merciful, as becomes soldiers and frogs.”

Then all the frog soldiers hurrahed and waved their swords, and there was such a din that Daffodil was quite terrified, thinking they were going to rush upon her at once and make an end of her.

When quiet was restored, six soldiers advanced and stood round her, pointing their lances at her to warn her not to resist. Two others secured her hands behind her back with their belts. Then twenty picked frogs were told off to remain with her as a guard, and the Officer in Command directed the Officer Next in Command to march the troops back to their barracks. He decided to go home himself to write his report to the King; but first he sent his Aide‐de‐camp to tell Their Majesties everything that had happened.

The King was asleep when the messenger came, but the Queen, on hearing the narrative, felt so curious to see the prisoner, that, when she was assured it was quite safe, she resolved to go herself to the Great Throne Hall, the room into which Daffodil had tumbled. The Officer in Command, after giving precise instructions to the guard about the necessary precautions in case of any attempt of the enemy at a surprise, was just leaving the Hall, muttering to himself the first paragraph of the report, when he saw Her Majesty enter, with her Royal Mantle all crooked from the haste with which page: 21 she had put it on, with only her third best crown that she kept for indoors wear when she did not expect to see any visitors, and attended by not more than a dozen Lords and Ladies in Waiting. So great had been her Royal haste. He flopped hurriedly to the door to receive her. And the Queen, in the most gracious manner, said to him “Brave as ever, Sir Ghxrrschcroxbog. Accept our Royal thanks, His Majesty’s and mine.”

But the Officer in Command looked terribly disappointed, for he had expected to be promised a peerage. However, he made the best of it and replied, with a tremendously low bow, that no reward that could have been given him would have been worth those words from Her Majesty.

“I should think so, indeed,” said the Queen. “And now, have the prisoner brought forward.”

So the Officer in Command flopped backwards to the end of the Hall where Daffodil was being kept in custody, and, at his order, the twenty guards marched her up to the Queen, and then fell back respectfully.

Daffodil, perceiving by the crown, though it was rather a shabby one, that she was in the presence of Royalty, was so impressed that she managed to make a yet lower curtsey than she had made to the Officer in Command; at which the Queen was pleased, for she had never seen curtseying before and she thought it looked extremely loyal. The frogs’ way of bowing and curtseying to Royalty is to hop three times round It. They hop twice round a superior below Royal rank, or to a distant acquaintance, and once round a familiar acquaintance.

The Queen spoke to Daffodil, but Daffodil could page: 22 only say “If you please, I am sorry, but I don’t know Froggais.” Now the Queen had been instructed by the Regius Professor of Everything and was the most learned woman in Croäxaxica, which is the native name for Frogland. She desired one of the soldiers to turn the prisoner slowly round several times that she might view the creature thoroughly. Then she leant her head on her hand and remained in deep thought for ten minutes, while, for fear of disturbing her reflections, the Lords and Ladies in Waiting and the Officer in Command and the soldiers stood as mute and motionless as statues, trying not to breathe.

“The thing is a human being,” said the Queen, at last. “Get me the Treatise on the Modes of Articulation, Pronunciations, and Dialects of the Inferior Races, with Glossary and Directions for Imitating the various Pronunciations.”

An attendant rushed off obediently, and soon returned with the book. It was not quite like one of our books. Its leaves, which were of two different tints, white and yellow alternately, were thick and waxy‐looking, and were rounded off instead of having straight lines and corners like ours. They were, in fact, the petals of large flowers of the water‐lily kind which are especially cultivated for writing and printing on. The printing is done by pointed implements with which the letters are pricked in. These implements are long and sharp, so that many leaves at a time can be pricked through by them. Only one side of a leaf is used: the lines are arranged rather far apart and care is taken in the binding that the pricks on one leaf shall not lie upon the pricks on the next leaf but shall be just over the page: 23 smooth part between the lines, so that the yellow leaves shall show through the pricked lines of white leaves and the white leaves through the pricked lines of yellow leaves. Sometimes green leaves are used instead of yellow; but the yellow are considered the best and cost the most, so, of course, the Queen had yellow. The binding of Croäxaxican books is sometimes very elaborate. This one, which had been presented to the Queen by its author, the Regius Professor of Everything, had for cover the petals of a crimson lily of the same nature as that of which its leaves were made, but much thicker: the cover was adorned with a mosaic pattern in small white, blue, and gold‐coloured petals. And, as the book had just been taken out of the water, it glistened all over. The Croäxaxican bookshelves are cut in the ground like drains, and are always kept full of water. The books are arranged in them side by side, as we place ours, only that they do not stand upright: it is as if we laid our bookshelves on the ground instead of setting them up against the walls. Care is taken to arrange the books according to their sizes and to keep them level, and they make a very handsome floor. Of course no furniture is stood on them. And the Croäxaxicans do not tread upon them, but hop gently over from step to step of the moss partitions between them. These partition‐strips of moss are made wide enough for a frog to stand on them and get out a book comfortably. In the Royal Library they are so wide that there is room on them for seats and couches and writing‐tables, which is a very pleasant and convenient arrangement.

The Queen took her book and turned to the part “On the Dialect of Human Beings.” And first, as there was a short introduction describing the appearance of human beings, she compared Daffodil with the description. “An odd‐looking tangled tuft of coloured rushes growing on the head—very long in the female,” she said. “Quite so. This is a female. Look at the tangled rushes. I suppose they were green in the summer.”

“Fleshy red mouths which do not reach across the face, but, stopping short as it were half way, give them a ridiculous appearance,” she read again. “Just so. Look how absurd it is: her mouth stops short just under that knob over the nostrils. And the knob—yes the book says human beings all have that strange excrescence.”

All the attendants said “Your Majesty is evidently right, as usual. This is a human being.” And they whispered to each other in very loud whispers “Is it not wonderful? She knows everything! She knows more even than the Regius Professor of Everything!” Every one was in such a hurry to whisper it first that they were all whispering at once, so that there was a rustling sound like the surge among the rushes on a windy day.

But the Queen said “Hush!” for she wanted to read over the rules of pronunciation, which she had a little forgotten, although she had once read some of them some years before. She read them for twenty minutes, in the midst of a profound silence. Then she said to Daffodil “Ghxoogh Ghxar Ghxooghxxxxh?”

That puzzled Daffodil very much, and she could only reply by making a curtsey and shaking her page: 25 head hard. So the Queen read her book for thirty minutes more, and then she said “Ghxoogh Ghar Ghxooghxxxh?” And Daffodil curtseyed, and shook her head harder.

Then the Queen read her book for three‐quarters of an hour. And at the end of that time she looked up, and said exactly the same as she had before.

Daffodil was luckier this time. She made out that the Queen was saying “Who are you?” So with a deeper curtsey than ever, for she saw that the Queen approved of her curtseys, she answered “If you please I am Daffodil. And my breaking the roof was not my fault I do assure you, please Your Majesty. When I was in the mud I could not help kicking to try to get out, and I would not have broken your beautiful ceiling on any account if I had known it was there.”

The Queen looked bewildered. “Ghxxayitxhxxagainxgh” she said, and Daffodil understood that she was to repeat her speech. So she said the very same words as before, and tried to pronounce them very distinctly. And the Queen put her hand behind her right ear and leant forward listening attentively.

“Ghxxayitxghxxxagainxgh” she replied when Daffodil had finished. And Daffodil said it again very slowly and carefully.

This time the Queen did not tell her to repeat it. But she remained silent for ten minutes looking very puzzled. Then she put her paws to her ears and said to her attendants “Oh! it goes through my head! I cannot endure this poor creature’s discordant noise any longer. It is too painful!”

And all the attendants and the Officer in Command and the twenty soldiers put their hands to their ears. And the attendants and the Officer in Command all said “It is too painful, too painful.” The soldiers all shook their heads slowly: it was not allowable for them to speak.

“There is only one thing to be done,” said the Queen. “It must be confined in the State Prison for two or three days, and the Regius Professor of Everything must be sent to it. Let me see—this is Monday: I order that it shall talk reasonably by Thursday. Then we will have a Drawing‐room, and it will be a treat for you all to hear me examine it.”

“What a delightful plan! How profound! How judicious! How diplomatic!” they all said. And Daffodil was marched off at once to the State Prison.